When things go too far.

Is it too soon to be writing again?

OH.

Probably! But that begs the question “do I care” which also begs the questions “do I have a life” and then by appearances it seems like I do—school, work, le boyfriend. So then its like “do you live your life actually Alaina?”

Do you ever have those days where you're just like

“Wow. Upon deep personal introspection, meditation, and secluded and extended profound thought,

 I feel an urgent need to GET MY CRAP TOGETHER.”

This is a really pressing matter. So this week’s goal is to get my life together. And I’m fairly confident that I’ll be successful because my ever-loving father is threatening to pull the purse strings. Heaven help me if it ever comes to such an ugly, ugly arrangement.

Our conversation enlightening him as to the current state of my togetherness went like this:

“Alaina what do you do with your life.”—Dad (at this point I was highly suspicious of his suspicions)

“Snapchat” 

“WHAT THE aopiadsklfh OK YOUR MONETARY SUPPORT IS GONE IF I DON’T SEE STRAIGHT A’S THIS SEMESTER!!!”

“ok let me just add you saying that to my snap story so I don’t forget for the next 24 hours.”

Do you guys understand the statistical likelihood of me securing straight a’s this semester?

Because frankly--I'm saying its too late. The towels been thrown. Onto the wet floor of mediocre grades that will one day get me a fine job.

I’d say that largely my inability to perform scholastically is due to a few minor addictions.

*disclaimer* None of you will please acknowledge the fact that you’ve been able to ascertain that I’m less than perfect due to my cyber presence. The thought of anything I put on the internet portraying me as not perfect is literally the most horrible thing I could possibly imagine. WHAT DO YOU THINK SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS ARE FOR.  #rollwiththefacade

So this sucks.

But I am addicted to a few things in life. And as we all know, when people have addictions THEY CANT HELP THEMSELVES. This has been clinically proven by a test I will not put here not because I do not know where such a test exists.

Here is the official listy:

1.       Writing

2.       Spotify

3.       Not exercising

4.       snapchat

5.       Engage global and my fellow coworkers.
6.    knowing devastating financial blows at Sephora and Ulta

If you cant see that this blog is an actual cry for professional help, you are probably a really normal, healthy, high-functioning person.

If you have any recommendations for addiction recovery, plz help.

Should I break these down a little? Then you will all understand the seriousness of my current state.

Wait who sanctioned this

Me and my coolest ginger coworker,
Maddie, demonstrating the power of snapping.
But truly I love her much

But wait...the above listed addictions will take sweet time and money to expound upon and explain, and right now, given the high pressure I'm operating under thanks to potential loss of financial funds in the uncomfortably near future, I’m low on both commodities.

Does that make zero sense?

Good. So for now I’ll help you understand the most disconcerting addiction and in future posts I’ll expand on the others.

So snapchat.

I mean I think originally my intentions in opening an account were justified—even laudable maybe. But as time has ticked on, i've just gotten a little like, sucked in maybe.

Cuz you know some of you were privileged to see some of my first post-mission snaps. I just wanted to fit in—to have a social place in this cold, cruel world. Then I realized I was quickly dominating the snapping game and that others were looking to me for guidance and direction. So it was too late to stop.

Plus when you're snapping people like huff daddy  and Wesley James Turner who produce this caliber of snap

the handsomest devil.

where can i purchase "vivint"??

wes looking at the dumpster

clever.

You can get pretty involved pretty quickly.

Basically snapping occupies all my free time and all my occupied time. From selfies to seeing what is going on in Armenia on any given day, to watching BYU freshmen do really cool things like sing in the tunnel, I think I'm hooked. 

We'll see what can be done to alleviate the situation.